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Newspaper Ads Gone Wrong

Submitted by John Baker

The following ads actually appeared in newspapers

ILLITERATE? Write today for free help.

AUTO REPAIR SERVICE. Free pick up and delivery. Try us once,
you will never go anywhere again.

DOG FOR SALE: Eats anything and is fond of children.

STOCK UP AND SAVE. Limit: one.

SEMI ANNUAL AFTER XMAS SALE

DINNER SPECIAL. Turkey $3.25; Chicken or Beef $2.25;
Children $2.00

FOR SALE: Antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs
and large drawers.

NOW IS YOUR CHANCE to have your ears pierced and get an
extra pair to take home, too.

GREAT DAMES for sale.

TIRED OF CLEANING YOURSELF? Let me do it.